Hmmm, what to write. Whether ’tis nobler…..wait, that line’s been taken. I’ve been pondering much of my day what to post or if to post, this day being the first day of the rest of my life so to speak. It’s the first official day of my retirement, early retirement if it matters. I tried …
I feel like Jack Nicholson in “The Shining” where he sticks his head through the door and says “I’m Back”, although as I recall he said it more like “I’m baaaack”. As it turns out when I did a Google search for a picture it came up with the photo you see and it was …
I’m happy, I’m sad, I’m both, I’m neither. I’m disappointed my career is almost over, but I’m stoked that retirement is imminent. The appreciation was missing, the acknowledgement of dedicated service for so many years. I’m now invisible, a cog on the wheel, a link in the chain that’s seen but not “seen”. Utilized but …
The snow is falling, or what could be loosely described as snow. Maybe dust, white powder dust would be more appropriate, almost like large flakes of flour. The kind of dust that you barely glimpse, but can see when the sunshine catches them as it’s rays filters through the window. This same white powder fell …
It has been a while since I’ve spent time with Dad, partly just due to our time constraints, some travel, and that I just plain and simple did not have the emotional energy and fortitude to do it. Bad Son, I know. Really though, deep down I know I am not a bad Son, probably …
I had another session with Gloria tonight (my counselor) and the conversation ranged from parental parenting, as in dealing with my Dad, to latent feelings of grief and loss. We even threw a little bit of emotional support regarding crying and “triggers” when it comes to loss, and the strong emotions that can come forward …
We took Dad out for dinner last night, we being Me, Mo, my Mom (Dad’s ex), and of course Dad. I called him in advance to see if he was free and he was very “befuddled” on the phone. And that’s his exact word, “befuddled”. When I queried him on what he was getting at …
Well Dad’s had his assessment and it sounds like he’s a good candidate for assisted living. I think we are well on our way to having him move closer to us, soon I hope, but there are still a few hurdles that need to be crossed. The current one is getting his current tax info. …
So if honesty is important to my posts I’d have to say I’m often bored in conversations with others. It just seems like so much of what we say to each other is mundane, I don’t have the knack for small talk, don’t necessarily want to either. I think it comes back around to the …
It’s often interesting to me how the written word, and often other benign media, can have such an impact on ones mood, in this case bringing me to sadness. It’s not only the sadness of loss, which I certainly feel, but the sadness of loves felt and missed. The book I’m reading, fiction in this …