Although I’m looking forward to camping and seeing family this summer I hope the hubbub doesn’t get to me, and there’s a good chance that at some point it will. The activity and noise will wear on me and I’ll likely withdraw somewhat and retreat to my safe place.
I’m a very private person, some would say reclusive and others may think snobbish or stuck up. I don’t think I’m either of the latter, I just don’t mind my own company and I’m easily overwhelmed by activity, especially if I feel as if I’m thrust into it. It’s just the kind of person I am and that has to be ok. I’ve heard it described as gifted, or over-excitable but whatever the reason the intensity of a group interaction is often stressful, sometimes very much so.
My wife has grown to accept this characteristic of mine and when we family camp we always take our own site rather than sharing a double site or trying to squeeze, with others, into a single. Frequently we’ll take some private time camping before or after the family camping so we can re-connect and share alone-time together.
I need my space and am much happier when left to read or otherwise bond with myself. I can write or journal, putter on something like my bike, the trailer or truck, or just have a beer and chill. It’s the closest thing I can find to Nirvana and I’m perfectly happy being left to my own devices.
The rest of the family also appears to accept it and although I’m not sure how my alone-time is explained to my nieces and nephews it is still respected. “Uncle” (me) is still asked if he wants to go on bike rides or walks and I will frequently accept. I still love my family and cherish our relationships. It just has to be in smaller doses than it may be with other families.
So despite the activity and noise I will adapt, I will enjoy the camping and family time holding to the thought that they won’t always be with us. If there’s one thing I’ve learned is that life is short, and fickle. Enjoy the moments while you can.